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Aug. 1st, 2011 | 06:35 pm
location: Mechanicsburg, S Sporting Hill Rd, 216

Thunderstorms are awesome, but they don't hold a candle to you when I've eaten the last mini snickers bar.

Posted via LiveJournal app for Android.


Rant! RANT!

Apr. 2nd, 2011 | 02:14 pm
mood: busy busy
music: There Goes My Life - Kenny Chesney

On Significant Others and Things...Collapse )

Crazy. or not so Crazy.

Mar. 15th, 2011 | 09:52 am
mood: awake awake
music: oh yeah, by the way - over the rhine

A recent post by Chels had me thinking. (as if that's strange).

Having a kid is a nerve wracking experience. I mean, I worry about 'becca ALL THE TIME!.

I usually just laugh it off, but when I'm in class, sometimes I get gripped by this horrible panic. What if she's hurt? and my phone for some reason isn't getting signal? Usually, that's solved by taking my phone out of my pocket and checking it. But then the scenario gets even more morbid. Gramma can't call because there was a fire, and EVERYONE died.

Yes, in my brain, the eventual result of any given catastrophe is that everyone dies. And nobody tells me.

It's just strange. I wrote an intro to a short story a long time ago about how the main character muses that he thought that love meant the end of fear. Instead, he realizes that love is all about fear. He's afraid he'll lose her, he's afraid he doesn't say the right things, he's afraid that he won't be there when it counts...he's afraid of a myriad of things all the time!

I don't think I thought it through though, because another thing love does, besides make me a paranoid wreck, is it gives me the courage to face those what ifs.

Still, when Hil has the kidlet out with her, and I call and they don't answer, I still have this horrific scenario run through my head that usually involves a tractor trailer, a freak snow storm and zomg, why won't she answer?

Tags: ,

Writer's Block: The start of something wonderful

Feb. 5th, 2011 | 08:15 pm
mood: snarky snarky

What is your favorite opening line of a book, and why?

"It was morning, and the new sun sparkled gold across the ripples of a gentle sea."


"The unicorn lived in a lilac wood, and she lived all alone."


"If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don't feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth."

There are so many opening lines to books that I read, and reread and read so much that the books become fragments of their former selves. pages creased, corners bent, favorite passages underlined, notes in the margins...

Those three were the ones I could remember off the top of my head, but there are others. To ask me to choose just one? Far better to ask me to choose which random person I meet next that I would like to punch in the face. It's just as hard of a decision really. Actually, the punching thing would probably be easier.

Some post Christmas thoughts...

Dec. 27th, 2010 | 02:17 am
location: harrisburg, pa
mood: sleepy sleepy
music: wind blowing outside.

What I meant to say...Collapse )
Tags: ,

Truth comes when you least expect it...

Dec. 26th, 2010 | 04:34 pm

What I'm saying is that I think, maybe, the best things, the richest things aren't supposed to come easily, and that sometimes the moments that make the most sense happen when everything else doesn't...

Public Class Friendship

Dec. 22nd, 2010 | 11:23 pm
mood: geeky geeky
music: Tonight - Sugarland

public class friendship
     public static void main(String[] args)
          //set variables
         String me,
          int time;
          double feelings;
          boolean whatNow == pertinentQuestion(you, me, feelings);

          relationship us = new relationship();

          if (whatNow == true)
               double future = (you + me);
               whatNow = pertinentQuestion(me, you, us, feelings);
               } while (whatNow == true)

          else (us = 0);

If only it were this easy, right?

Year in Review, courtesy of oddharmonic

Dec. 22nd, 2010 | 08:25 pm
mood: cheating!
music: rough draft - yellowcard

Year in Review MemeCollapse )

That Eclipse...

Dec. 21st, 2010 | 04:07 pm
location: here
mood: amused amused
music: DeRezzed - Tron - Legacy(OST)

Well, it was a total lunar eclipse, but the clouds kept getting in the way! I was so mad at those stupid clouds for ruining my view....then, I calmed down and I started looking at how pretty the clouds were, lit from behind by that dusky red moon. And it was pretty. And of course, as soon as I started to appreciate how nice the clouds looked, they went away, and I got to look at the dumb old moon again. Jeez. Never satisfied, am I?

The kidlet had her birthday party, and all went well, and can I just say, I am soooo glad that it wasn't at the house, and that I didn't have to clean up? I mean, she made an absolute disaster of that cake, and I don't know if anyone will ever be the same again. She had fun, and I took pics, and a short video, and I'm in the process of cleaning it up and adding music and transitions, and speaking of music...

Tron Legacy OST. zomg. fml. whatever netspeak abbreviation you want to append there, feel free. Want some omgbbq? cool. a bit of wtf? sure. a dash of bbl? umm...okay, not sure that fits, but I did say whatever netspeak abbreviation...so...

But I really like that album. and the movie was pretty darn spankin' too. heh.

Had her one year appointment with the doctor today. She had to get two immunization boosters, which thrilled her immensely, especially with her cold. Thankfully she's been sleeping most of the day, which has let me...slump in a chair and not move much, because I'm not as young as I used to be and staying up till 4am to watch the moon/clouds/sky hurts a little more than it used to. Just a little.

In other news, the universe obviously thinks its a funny girl. Because, well...she just does. Oh, you funny funny universe and your dark matter and hyper threads and one atom thick high density gravitational ley lines. You're just teasing me now. hah.

And I'm still working on my year in review. woot.

Well then...

Dec. 18th, 2010 | 03:30 pm
location: home
mood: contemplative contemplative
music: My How You've Grown - 10,000 Maniacs

Has it really been a year since I last wrote anything here?

I suppose it has. Where did the time go?

Oh yes, I remember now. It went the way it always does, into the past.

The first thing I noticed, is that for the first year, in a long time, the 13th came and went, and I didn't even really notice. Blame it on finals, blame it on the kidlet, blame it on whatever you like, but I suppose that just means that time has created a hard enough scab that incidental brushes don't even twinge anymore. Well, maybe a little, they do.

Oh, and yes. I have a kidlet now. She's...a year old? exactly 365 days old, as of today. tomorrow is her official birthday, and I am...amazed at how much she has grown. This little ragamuffin that has completely taken over my life, and become the reason...well...the reason for everything, I suppose.

Isn't that cliche? Isn't that just...overly cliche'd? It is, but they aren't cliches because they're not truths.

I remember once, a conversation I had with Heather, where I posited a situation, where the house was on fire, and you only had time to save one person. Your wife or your child. And at that time, I was so confident of myself....so sure, that the one I would save would be my wife. The one who you had stood up in front of the world to say, "You. I choose you above all others...I choose you." Oh, the hubris of inexperience, right? Because, even though I never stood up in front of anyone to say it, I would choose Rebecca over pretty much anyone else. Well, that's a lie. The truth is, I would choose her well being, her health, her happiness over anyone else's. So, there you go, Heather. I admit it. I was wrong.

A year old. really? It does seem just like yesterday that she came home, this small bundle of cloth and squirming flesh. I could hold her in the crook of my arm, and not have any part of her stick out. Now, she walks, she talks, she pats my face, she...she's a person. A person. And that amazes me. It will amaze me until the day I close my eyes for the last time, that I helped make this person, who will have her own dreams, her own hopes, her own...life. And maybe, on some level, I understand that it's mostly biological, the feelings for her are driven by chemicals and neurons and hormones, but that's all...science. It happens, it works, and I am amazed. Because on my day to day functional level, I just know that when she cries, I get anxious. When she smiles, when she laughs, I laugh with her. When she wants something, I do my best to figure out what it is. In short, I'm a dad.

Me. A dad. hah.

But, more updates to come, more thoughts on my year...a Year in Review, if you will. Because, it has been...quite a year.